Sunday, November 21, 2021

Softness and Truth

Electric liquid pools in wrists and hands

Activated by a heart being noticed

Autopilot mode's power cut off

Mindfulness floods in hot and fiery

Gentle care like cotton fleece

 Supports the work of becoming aware

A breath the cushion for a hazy stare 

The push to determine next steps

Shouting callously from somewhere 

To be here now 

Is all that it is fair


Sunday, November 14, 2021

Space

"Space"

Amanda C. Symmes, LICSW


Sitting down with the feelings today


No knocking needed- just come on in

and join me for a cup of tea

(or whatever you'd like to sip on) 


Then spill it -


Tell me what I need to know right now,

Why are you here?


Resentment, you can talk first, 

You've been 

awfully loud lately...

what gives?


PAUSE

CLOSE EYES

BREATHE


Ohhhhh, what an interesting shade 

of excrement you are


Sitting quietly with you 

here and acutely mulling over-

your role

purpose 

message 


You fizz into everything I do lately

Your rancid stench is strong and refuses 

dissipation

I'll find what's rotting, to free you


What's that? 


Your near enemies are stress and frustration? 

And since they've been improperly cared for

you had to step in? 


Welcome

 I am ready to listen


Breathing leads to seeing leads to hearing leads to healing


You say your far enemies are

autonomy and space? 


Why YES. Of course they are.


Okay, I see you

I appreciate this offering 

Breathing in, I make space for all of it


And your message

seems tangled up in 

something else?


Who is that hiding

behind you? 

Why are they holding your

hand? 


Come in, come in


Share your tea with me, please.


Ohhh, there you are Fear.

 I almost didn't recognize you. 

Perhaps, I neglect to actually look at you mostly,

it is simply too much to hold

but seeing you hold resentment's hand 

I feel less afraid. 


I see you in yourself.  


You come in so many colors-heavy and expansive


The gradience of gray

comes alive now, majestically

Purple and emerald are 

fused here twisting around inside as well


My chest tightens only briefly at

at the thought of letting you stay 

 

But in your other hand I see

your tea you clutch is trembling as you

seek your own release from me


It's not the other way around


Has it been this way all along?


I wasn't paying attention Fear

and I am sorry for that


You are obtuse and seeing all

the dangers ahead is your job 

and it can serve me if I listen with wisdom

and discern well


Rather, in my rejection of you

you've become caged here

with me


Each of us stuck holding the key for the other 


So while resentment has stepped to the side

It waits for you and I

to do our thing...


Inhale, Exhale, Release


Oh how beautiful

Your tea is gone and we've

pulled ourselves together

You are not shaking and

foreboding at all


You are a magnificent swirling

energetic light 

Pure power and potential 


When I see you as this

you only become more

precious and beautiful 

and like a ribbon or an aurora 


You call for me to trust

Encircling me in electricity, fueling me with newness-

Faith

Each of us, drawing energy from the other, 

we gain strength to move on


Your near enemy may be worry,

But your far enemy is the bravery that I need right now


I had no idea that looking just a bit closer and holding myself still here, 

That I would find you...


What is coming next, I do not know


How wondrous to not get to know!?


Relief whispers that our path has not ended yet


We dodged the temptation to shove

ourselves onto the highway

of "expected next steps"

for a quick trip to nowhere good


 Continuing this slow journey

With caution-

 This terrain is less traversed

So the perils that lurk can hurt, at times


These messengers that dropped in for tea 

Remind

to give mind to all of it


They were never trying to take up residence

In fact they have already alerted the 

more important guests to arrive


Soon


They just sought time tea for tea

With me

To spill into this space together


Now that I feel them

slipping out the door


I am content in my home with Space.